The Object of My Child's Affection

Every parent has been there; you're on the way out, and your child is keeping you back by looking for his favorite teddy bear. Or maybe your 7 month old won't stop screaming because her pacifier has fallen out. As parents you know how debilitating this can be in your life. You should keep in mind, though, to your toddler the lack of his worn out teddy bear is what will feel frustrating. Comfort items are just what they sound like, and are a significant, healthy part of growing up.

By the time children reach the age of 1, they've already turned to a comfort or security object they keep kept with them at nearly all times. For babies, a binkie or even their thumb will typically work rather nicely to relieve and quiet them when they are upset. As your baby becomes a toddler, they frequently look for something a little more physically satisfying such as a favorite stuffed animal or blankie. Many believe that the texture is partly responsible for the warm effect they've got on young children. Toddlers will usually rub a blankie on their face or arm or caress a teddy bear in order to sooth themselves.

An additional comfort feature your toddler might discover with comfort items is the fact that it reminds them of you. The material of a blanket rubbed on your child's face might remind them of your skin or clothing when being cradled or hugged by you. Or maybe the soft toy has always been part of their naptime routine you developed with your child. Again, the association with you comforting your child or making her feel protected is what prompts the connection to these comfort toys. Once in a while young children make a comfort item out of less typical things. Anything from a toy truck to a mitten. Even though this type of attachment may not be as recognizable, there is usually some emotional attachment the child has made to get security or comfort from the item.

Although it may be bothersome for you to cope with your child's consistent need for their toy or blankie, it is helpful to know that this time is both important and healthy. The world can be terrifying to a child, especially as they approach their first birthday. It's sometime in these years that a child begins to suffer from separation anxiety because they're more likely to be separated from you because of daycare, playschool, or even on their own as they are capable of exploring their world. By using a comfort object, your child is finding a way to comfort himself when you aren't there for them and as they become independant. Think of it as a temporary support to help them through this growth in their lives.

It won't be until your child reaches age three that he or she will begin to control their own feelings and stop relying on a security object for soothing, according to a child-development expect, Jane Kostelc. It is at this same age that carrying an old dirty blanket might seem less socially acceptable among their peers. Who knew our children had peer pressure issues so young? Anyway, it's probably best for parents to accept this phase of your child's development as the stepping stone that it is. When you do so you'll only help their emotional development and growth. Something that is most certainly worth momentary frustration.